בסיעתא דשמיא


Direction and encouragement for the ultimate change

Loving Direction and Encouragement for the Ultimate Change""
Every mitzvah which seems to be difficult and/or unpopular comes with an exceedingly great reward.  Its reward and recompense is up to 500 times greater than an easy mitzvah, because your Employer, Hashem, is faithful to recompense you      for all your efforts, anguish, and difficulties – very greatly!!!לפום צערא אגרא
So remember never to feel overwhelmed, depressed and never to complain because unlike human employers, Hashem faithfully pays for every effort and anguish even when the mitzvah or its results are not complete. You are advised to remain calm and happy since you are doing Hashem's great Will and probably against the mainstream just like our Holy Parents: Avraham and Sarah!  The seeming difficulties dissolve in thin air when we realize that we shall be certainly compensated up to 500 times more than for an easy to fulfill commandment!! When one desires to follow the words of our great Torah leaders starting with the 33 in this booklet one may see one's shaky dreams to appear like a model or movie star (with a showy wig) dissolve before one's eyes!  So let's be strong and decide to give up those materialistic values replacing them with life giving, spiritual, eternal values .This is how one merits the eternal world and its unimaginable delights. For this delightful end one should be ready to give up one's false self- delusions and exchange these strange and goyish values for pure and holy Jewish values that will earn for us Life in Eternity. Please, beloved Jewish women don't allow the Evil Inclination to seduce you to act according to his evil will, even if the Evil One gives you a thrill of temporary materialistic pleasures. The untarnished truth is that you will thus forfeit the real Eternal pleasures of the Eternal world and the World to Come by following the Evil Inclination!  It's known that his evil wish is to destroy you - so don't allow this to happen- Chas v'Shalom! Please be very firm and strong and totally refuse to give in to the seducing temptations of the evil inclination so that you won't be doomed to his evil destruction, and lose, Chalilah, your tremendous portion of Life in Eternity! Our materialistic dreams are a mistake and should be exchanged for a deep yearning to emulate the Holy Mothers' great, great, modesty: as for example the modesty of Sarah, our first Holy Mother.Our yearnings to emulate her has the power to illuminate our being with a great holy light and wisdom and give us heavenly assistance in every step we take to reach our goals. We thereby attain Jewish grace, a more sought after trait than cold beauty. The Holy Matriarchs were a great light to the nations surrounding them. Sarah made many women converts to the one true G-d, and she was a great light for Hagar who sought to emulate her ways and modesty and to this very day we see Hagar's descendents(Arab women ) still cleaving to Sarah's way, with their completely modest head coverings, maintaining the custom of our Holy Matriarchs in their head coverings!! Our Holy Matriarchs always wore completely modest head coverings which covered the entire head of hair plus the back and sides of the neck. This headdress code certainly preserved their holiness and supreme prophecy and closeness to G-d. Because Sarah hid her great exquisite beauty with great modesty she was beloved by Hashem and by Avraham, her husband and she was rewarded with prophecy over and above that of Avraham's and merited an extremely holy son, Yitzchak the perfect offering to Hashem. In her praises were said 'Behold she is in her tent.": When Avraham had male guests the modest Sarah stayed in her personal tent throughout the
whole visit! There she prepared bread, matsot and other foods for his guests but she never stuck in her head to Avraham's tent to look or to be seen! Even when Avraham served his guests under a tree on a pleasant weather day Sarah kept her genuine pure modesty and never left her tent! It was Avraham who came into Sarah's tent to take the food and bread she prepared and went out to serve his guests. Due to her great modesty she never required a mechitsah she simply stayed in her closed tent at all costs no matter what the weather was like. This awesome modesty was praised by the angels who came to eat (seemingly eat ) with Avraham . Immediately after they praised her for her awesome modesty the angels blessed them that she would give birth to a boy in one years time (when she will be 90 years old) and whom they named Yitschak. Even when she had to leave her tent to take care of her family's spiritual and materialistic needs she seemed to be still in her tent, a tent of very large loose tent-like clothes over her head and entire person, similar to either a sheet over her head and body or a long radid (long cape and hood) which covered her head and entire body. Though she was the most exquisitely beautiful woman in the world she had the most exquisite modesty to match it and Hashem greatly protected her so that even when she was kidnapped by Avimelech, she was released, totally unharmed because of her great merit of modesty. Sarah was the first woman to correct the sins of Eve (Chavah). The Creator gave Eve or (Chavah) 504 mitsvos, saying to her "Be Modest!" 504 times! We have seen above what modesty is: hiding one's person from the eyes of male guests, etc.! Let us see what modesty is not, as follows: Modesty means not to impress other women by dressing according to the latest  fashions, not to seek honour and compliments from friends and neighbours and not to have ulterior motives to G-d Forbid attract men. Modesty means placing Hashem first and not drawing unnecessary attention to one's self. The true beauty of the Jewish woman is reflected by her pure motives and pure deeds and they confer on her Jewish grace which is both a free gift and a partial reward for her deeds done with pure and genuine modesty and holiness and these deeds are also done with a good measure of extra - understanding (binah yeterah), a trait that was particularly bestowed upon the beloved and holy Jewess! Perhaps after reading this booklet, a new desire is awakened in you! Be happy and encouraged! You will be amply rewarded for your holy yearnings with every good quality and benefit, all the more so when you go ahead to actualise this desire by making the change to a full and modest head covering. Such a great improvement in modesty will give Hashem great nachat from you and entitles you to great nachat from your children and grandchildren for all generations, Praised be Hashem. You are to be praised  for your virtuous desire to improve your modesty (starting with the head) and in this beautiful merit may you go from strength to strength in every aspect of modesty. Remember the words in Eishet Chayil "Strength and majesty are her raiment and she will laugh on her last day." This means that a modest woman will see the Divine Presence of Hashem on her last day and this will grant her such great joy bringing her to laugh even though it is her last day and this refers also to the last day of the long exile, when she will merit absolutely holy joy, forever more, because in her beautiful merit of modesty she influenced the end of the exile and the nearing of the Final Redemption with kindness and mercy! I offer all my readers my warmest and best wishes that all of you merit to give our Sweet Heavenly father great nachat
in the principal mitzvah of women,  which is the beautiful mitzvah of "Modesty" and through this beautiful merit may Hashem illuminate his great new light on
Zion and bring the complete redemption speedily in our days. Dear beloved women: you are forewarned do not ask your husbands regarding their opinions in issues of modesty because modesty is the main mitzvah and the domain of women! Remember Adam HaRishon was not given even one command to be modest!  Asking your husband may certainly cause a great stumbling block in achieving your goals to improve on your present modesty.  Without consulting your husbands, and only if your budget allows you to do this,   buy several clothe head coverings  (scarves or snoods ) and wear them all week long and on Shabbos wear a clothe covering in different lighter colours. The safest colours to wear, are dark or light brown, black, gray, deep olive green, dark purple, deep maroon and navy blue as weekday colours. One may choose those colours which look best with one's complexion or face colour. Beige, pastel colours, off -white, and white are for shabbos. Red, fushiah, bright pink, royal blue and all bright, flashy colours are not recommended for obvious modesty reasons! Seek out perfect square pieces of very thin 100%cotton knits, as these are the most comfortable and do not slip and slide on the hair! Feel free to buy your head coverings at the fabric store and buy perfectly square pieces that you both overlock and evenly hem all around. In the fabric store you will have a greater chance of finding very thin cotton knits which do not slip and slide on the head and perhaps a greater selection of colours. You can be modest yet still refuse to be totally dull. Nevertheless, be very careful not to buy bright colors, since these attract the eyes, and such is the very opposite of one's modesty intent! Shiny elements on one's scarf should be totally avoided! If necessary ask for advice how to tie the scarf on your head to give you a pleasant neat appearance. To keep the scarf in place and to keep your hair neatly in place you may require ( this does not apply to those who have obtained thin, all - cotton knits which do not usually slip and slide on the head ) a properly fitting foam-cotton cap or an all-cotton short cap or a thin foam head strip underneath the scarf. This keeps the scarf from slipping and sliding and also prevents a strange flat head look. If you have thick massive hair use only the thinner foam strips available, which are placed inside the creased edge of the scarf or simply use a 100% cotton knit scarf  and/or  cotton cap under  the scarf ( without any foam) because pure layers of cotton also help to prevent the "sliding off "of the scarf. The most modest way to tie the scarf is by folding the perfect square into a triangle and placing the folded crease around your forehead and ears and then make a double- knot either behind your neck-nape or the more mehadrine way is tying the two ends under the chin, leaving the two ends hanging down loose in the front, which applies in either style. It is best not to elevate the ends which are left after the tying. If you wish, these two ends can be tied around the neck. As for snoods, always choose a snood that hugs the circumference of your head comfortably and firmly. If it is too loose, pull it tighter in the back of the neck and use a safety pin to secure this to help prevent the hair from coming loose and being exposed. You can later sew it down in that secured area, for permanency. Add a heartfelt prayer to merit authentic modesty, and ask a modest friend for guidance and assistance before shopping.  May Hashem be with you in every step of your way to guide you to the most completely modest head covering that suits you! Remind yourself constantly that such a great improvement brings Hashem great nachat from you and therefore Hashem may certainly reciprocate
by granting you great nachat and menuchat ha nefesh and this will bring a mood of great tranquillity to your home and family. Being authentically modest in
one's ways and behaviours and wearing a modest head covering will increase your Shalom Byit! This was proven and tested, but remember one needs to be most careful to stick with one's new head covering choices! There is no going backwards! The best solution for the wigs is to cut them in small pieces and dispose of them immediately! The wigs may not remain in the house nor be sold/given away, and they should be cut up beforehand, so that no one can benefit from them at all! This is because there is a very significant suspicion of them being made of hair that was of the gifts to idolworship, and this includes even 100% synthetic wigs, since all of these definitely include at least 4% human hair. Even with a very slight suspicion, or just a very tiny percentage of real human hair one must act "Le Chumrah" since this prohibition is a "deraisah" (Torah one). Under these above conditions to fully rid yourself of all of your wigs, your Shlome Byit should flourish, G-d willing. I bless you to have not only Shlome Byit but bless both of you that the holy Divine Presence rests on both of you and your whole house -  at all times! Although, generally speaking, men may not be consulted in modesty issues there are some great exceptions to the rule and they are the great and holy Rabbis of all the generations, and the following is a small sampling of 33 holy Righteous Rabbis and holy men of the over two-hundred Rabbis who explicitly and vehemently spoke out against Jewish woman's wigs worn in public. May you enjoy the great supportive words of these great Rabbis and Holy men who certainly support your holy decisions to change to a modest scarf.  In this, you will sanctify Hashem's Name in the world since you will be fulfilling His Will and making Hashem most Happy! This can certainly be a constant Sanctification of Hashem's Holy Name which certainly brings great blessings to women. Fortunate are you! May you go from strength to strength. This is a great beginning for you, and a great cause for celebration. Whatever blessing or salvation one needs can be requested in the special merit of this change as this certainly improves one's tznius.                                                         One of the great Holy Rabbis (the admore
of Alexander) said to prepare a special Kiddush on Shabbos to celebrate this holy change, just like one would make a Kiddush for the birth of a daughter. Remind yourself that you are the precious daughter of the King of Kings and with this holy change it is as if you are being reborn!! This holy celebration or Kiddush is for your wonderful Rebirth! Mazal Tov!! Therefore- may you merit all the wonderful Blessings of our Holy Torah!    
 Here I include a Holy Letter written by the Son of the Beloved, Holy, Genious Master and Rabbi:  Shlomoh Zalman Orbach zats'al : Shmuel Orbach Shlit'ah:
"Now, that we merited such a great awakening ( 5764 when the Jewish women sanctified Hashem's name by removing all of their wigs, and began wearing modest head coverings) which revealed the great pitfall of idolatrous offerings and the abomination of idolatry, and praise Hashem that this has also aroused an awakening for many Jewish women to return to the holy custom of the Holy Matriarchs ( Sarah, Rivkah, Rachel and Leah). G-d Forbid to now cool off this lofty matter with various excuses (such as Kashruth certifications). Jewish women, be strong and persevere and do not be shamed by mockers who try to
cool off your ardour!! Return the beautiful crown of modesty to your heads and be blessed with much holy nachat from your sons and daughters. Be blessed with
good health and with Hashem's favour. Through this acceptance to wear only a kerchief may you be blessed with all good, in all matters, in this world and in the next eternal world"!
A true testimonial: A Jewish wife relates: My husband took a long business trip that usually takes night and day. Though this was not the first time that he travelled for so long, but this time I was uneasy and tense. I called up my friend and she started to converse at length regarding head coverings and also persuaded me to change from a wig to a scarf. The next morning I was standing in front of my mirror, and arranging my scarf. It was very difficult for me to go out with only a scarf on my head, but thank G-d I was strong! When I stood in front of the mirror, I felt a very big change come over me. Instead of thinking how to go out looking more beautiful, I carefully considered how to go out with more modesty!
 In the afternoon my husband was supposed to have returned and it was already the beginning of the night and he hadn't returned yet! At every opportunity I ran to the window to see what was happening. Suddenly the house telephone rings and rings without interruption, and every moment I receive another call from my husband's friends: "where is your husband? He still hasn't returned?" And suddenly they close the telephone before I have a chance to ask any questions. It was then that I understood that something had happened. If such an occurrence as this would have happened at a different time I probably would have reacted hysterically. In this occasion I was calm, as I repeated to myself "It makes no sense that something would happen to my husband on the very day I broke something so hard for me in matters of modesty". At the end, my husband returns home at a very late hour and related to me all that had happened to him. I listened to every word and froze in my place. He said that in the car he travelled in, suddenly the driver lost control of the car - at full speed it fell in a ravine between rocks and that many, many screams were heard as bones and flesh were seen flying! The only one of the travellers that remained without a scratch was my husband! The rescue people were in shock- how was it possible that a person was able to come out of this accident whole, healthy and without a scratch- this was a revealed miracle which was later in the papers. Then I began to receive phone calls from people who heard about it. The most wonderful thing that my husband felt during the accident was that two strong hands were holding him in place during each of the times the auto stopped before a turn." Before the next turn, said her husband, I imagined that now I am going to be hurt, but The Holy One, Blessed is He decided differently and the other side of the car was hurt".I, his wife, heard and was so astonished that I wasn't able to move a limb. In that same week, I heard in one of the tapes in our house (from a big Rav) which explained "The modesty of the wife is like the altar in the Holy Temple, as the altar atones for sins of the Nation of Yisrael and tears up all the evil decrees- so does the authentic modesty of the wife which in a similar way atones for her children and rips up all the evil decrees that were decreed on the family"! Isn't Hashem Amazing, and may He be forever Blessed! It was the All - Merciful Hashem that sent her a friend to persuade her to change from a wig to a scarf and this persuasion and her immediate and sincere acceptance to change something difficult in modesty miraculously saved her husband's life!   
Given over with our Best and warmest wishes for your immediate success in improving your present modesty level and to succeed climbing up your ladder!
A women who does not cover her head brings torment and poverty on her husband and a women who covers her head with a wig is in the same category because today's wigs make a women seem as beautiful as if her hair is not covered and many men who see her in the street do not realize that she is wearing a wig, and they think it is her natural hair. Obviously wearing todays wigs falls in the category of extreme immodesty for married women.

  כתר מלכות - למען הקדושה והצניעות בהכוונת גדולי ישראל